I’m sure everyone knows who Darren Wilson is by now. If you don’t,
then well done to you for having successfully circumvented mainstream
media for the past few months. Long may your residence under that rock
Anyway, Officer Darren Wilson apparently resigned from Ferguson’s
police department a few days ago. Something about receiving “credible
threats to his life” blah blah blah.
So I figured rather than calling
for his head like I’ve been doing for months, I’d help him out a
little. So here are some career paths that Mr Wilson can attempt to
pursue now that he’s given up “serving (himself) and protecting
1. He could work for a bed factory…he seems pretty good at lying.
2. He could be an architect in earthquake prone areas. Who wouldn’t
want an architect who can build a case on a shaky foundation and it
still doesn’t collapse.
3. He could be one of those people who clean up crime scenes…the way he
twice thoroughly washed his hands before they were processed is
nothing short of an art form.
4. A quick call to Vince McMahon and I’m sure he could work for the WWE.
He was apparently beat up pretty bad by Mike Brown but had almost no
visible injuries whatsoever. That’s some skill right there.
5. Maybe he could join the IRS…they can never have too many employees
with an inability to show remorse.
6. He could be a security consultant for the Ku Klux Klan…for obvious reasons.
7. He could work in a sweat shop factory that makes flip flops…need I
throw in a punch line about flip flopping?
Whatever he decides, I’m sure he’ll succeed. He’s a white male…the
world is his oyster.
*just scribbling my thoughts*
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