Feels like forever since I scribbled anything on Tawanda’s Notepad. Blame that on the massive restructuring that my life is currently undergoing. Yep, new house, city, occupation, everything really. But forget all that. What I really want to talk (moan) about is this thing called fatherhood.
You see, for the past two weeks, I have had my 8 month old son with me. I’ve sort of been playing single dad, if you will. It’s been great really; very eye opening. I mean, I used to think the parent who stayed home with the kids had it easy. WRONG! Going to the office is way easier. In fact, I think a stint at Guantanamo Bay is easier than being a stay-at-home parent. Needless to say, I can’t wait to go back to the safety of my office chair and desk.
But like I said, overall, Little Tee and I have had a ball of a time. The problem is society’s unpreparedness for single dads. I’ll give you an example. Little Tee and I were at the mall the other day. The time comes when I need to change his nappy (that’s a diaper, for my American friends) and, lo and behold, there are no nappy changing facilities in the men’s bathrooms. So I go into the women’s bathrooms. Some women are coming in all perplexed like “what are you doing in here?” “Building a space shuttle” I retort …I mean, what the hell kind of question is that? I’m holding a poop filled nappy in my hand, staring at a baby’s butt….what does it look like I’m doing?
This is just one of many such incidents. The other day Little Tee and I are out having lunch. I ask for some boiling water from the waiter so I can make his milk. Whilst we wait, a hungry Tee starts crying. Some smart ass asks “where’s his mum?”…“she’s dead” I respond. Again, what the hell kind of question is that? What business is it of yours where his mum is? Idiot!
Later in the week, Little Tee and I are checking in for our flight to Jo’burg. I hand the guy at the flight desk our ID documents. He asks “will his mum be joining us?” …WHAT.THE.HELL.KIND.OF.QUESTION.IS.THAT? I look at him somewhat baffled and ask him politely (and, to some extent, condescendingly) “will your mum be joining us?”
My family is no exception. When I told my aunt I’d be playing single dad for a couple of weeks, she was shocked and all she could ask was “what about breast milk? What will Tee do without the breast? He needs the breast!” …“Well, wise Aunt Ruth, I was thinking of either getting a boob job or getting Tee some baby formula…whichever fits my budget (and sanity levels) I guess” …Oh and while I’m at it…what the hell kind of question is that?
I guess what I’m trying to say is Dads are parents too. Just ‘cause you see us with our kids in the absence of their mums, doesn’t mean we are going to capitulate or that our babies are going to end up sharing a box with a vagabond somewhere. So please, STOP ASKING ME WHERE MY BABY’S MAMA IS.
*just scribbling my daddy thoughts*
Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.